So this is Christmas......

and almost another year done.  I am not sure where the time went or why our lives are flying by so quickly. 

I had a lovely Christmas Eve and Christmas day with the engineer and his family and I had a much better time than the last few lonely and empty years.  My thanks and love to him and gratitude for filling the void. 

I still have moments (many of them) when I miss John with all my heart and soul - how can you be happily married for almost nineteen years and not miss your soulmate?  It has taken a lot of thought and consideration to make the move to another relationship.  At times it has felt like being a traitor to what we had - a life together and total trust and joy.  But he is gone and would not want me to grieve forever.  I really could and I actually dreamt about that a few nights ago and awoke to the feeling that I could not ever love again, but I lay awake in the early morning light and decided that I needed to live and love again and this man is special to me and is time to move on to a new life.

So it is time for a New Year - the world did not end on December 21st and may not end before the end of my life.  But that means that I need to live my life to the fullest before I reach the end of my time here on earth, so here goes making the best of everything that I have......

Back to quilting in the next few days.